Thursday: 3 x 25′ / 3′ rest (8′ @ 5kp, 17′ @ mp) – Breakthrough workout

I was a bit intimidated by this workout.  It wasn’t that I thought I would fail, I was pretty certain that I would complete it successfully.  Rather, I was dreading the 17 minutes at marathon pace.  In previous attempts at these step down workouts, I dug so deep in the 5kp section that the marathon pace sections were very taxing.  My HR stayed high and it was miserably hard work.

I was surprised and delighted today.  This workout didn’t feel easy, but I felt really good throughout.  My HR was way lower than any workout like this that I’ve done over the past few weeks.  I felt so good that I did the last 5 minutes at half marathon pace.

2-2k

Workout Summary - media/20170202-1405210o.csv
--|Total|-Total-|--Avg--|-Avg-|Avg-|-Avg-|-Max-|-Avg
--|Dist-|-Time--|-Pace--|-Pwr-|SPM-|-HR--|-HR--|-DPS
--|21146|90:00.0|02:07.7|193.5|22.7|151.1|166.0|10.4
W-|19796|79:00.0|01:59.7|204.8|22.6|152.8|166.0|11.1
R-|01354|11:00.0|04:03.6|069.6|22.7|135.5|166.0|02.9
Workout Details
#-|SDist|-Split-|-SPace-|-Pwr-|SPM-|AvgHR|MaxHR|DPS-
00|01011|04:00.0|01:58.7|210.9|21.8|129.7|147.0|11.6
01|02096|08:00.0|01:54.5|233.0|24.3|151.1|158.0|10.8 -target 225-240
02|04137|17:00.0|02:03.3|186.9|21.0|147.3|156.0|11.6 -target 180-195
03|02096|08:00.0|01:54.5|233.4|24.4|155.5|164.0|10.7 -target 225-240
04|04135|17:00.0|02:03.3|186.6|21.4|153.1|163.0|11.4 -target 180-195
05|02099|08:00.0|01:54.3|234.6|24.7|156.7|166.0|10.6 -target 225-240
06|04222|17:00.0|02:00.8|198.8|23.0|161.0|166.0|10.8 -target 180-195

I looked through the metrics.

  • A little bit of drive length variation in the last interval
  • peak force varying with power
  • you can see the same thing in the work per stroke.  I was effectively underrating the fast stuff and over rating the slow stuff
  • I see more variation in rhythm today.  Not sure why

Comparison to the 4 x 15′ (9′ @5kp, 6′ @ mp) workout form earlier this week.

  • Same powers, just different durations so it gets a bit confusing after the first rep.
  • Nearly identical stroke rates for the faster bits.  A bit lower for the slow today (because I felt fantastic)
  • The difference in HR is astounding.  My HR didn’t go nearly as high in the 5kp sections, and it recovered better in  the mp sections.

So, why was it better?

  • time of day: nope…same for both
  • nutrition state:  nope…fasted for both
  • amount of sleep: nope…~6.5 hours before both
  • temp/humity: nope…same for both
  • accumulated fatigue:  If anything I should have been worse today.  This is the 7th day in a row that I have rowed.  This session and the prior one were rowed the day after a low intensity 60 minute endurance session.

So, I am left with random variation and improved fitness.  I think there is lot of the former, and a little of the latter.

Tomorrow:  Probably nothing.  I have an early meeting, and then I head off to the airport for a trip to Korea.  I’ll be off the erg for a week.  I’m pretty bummed about that, I was just starting to see progress.

Thursday: 2×30′ fitness center

Wednesday:  First teleconference at 7am. Then another at 8.  Then off to the airport to fly to LAX, then more meetings and dinner with the team from our facility there.  No time to train.

Thursday:  It was going to be another long day.  First teleconference at 6am, which lasted until 8.  I had a bit of time before I needed to drive to San Diego, so I went to the hotel gym.  This session was more about stress management than training.  I just wanted to do something.

I did 30 minutes on the stationary bike (rollings hills, level 15).  Then 30 minutes on the elliptical trainer (rolling hills, level 15).  It turns out that rolling hills are easier on the elliptical.

1-26a.png

1-26b

After that, I showered, hopped in my car and drove down to San Diego.  Straight in to a prep meeting for 3 hours, then a meeting with our customer from 6pm until 8:30.  That left me just enough time to drive to the airport and catch the redeye home.  Well not quite home, I am now in Charlotte waiting for my connection and writing a journal entry.

After I get home, I think I’ll take a nap, and maybe do an easy erg session.

Tuesday: 30′ @ MP and skierg

Monday:  No training.  I flew out to San Jose, and headed straight into the office.  Straight from the office to a business dinner.  Back to hotel around 10pm.

Tuesday:  Early start, in the office at 7am to prep for big meeting.  Then lots of other meetings through the day.  My last meeting finished around 4pm and I decided to sneak out.  I went back to my hotel, threw on my workout clothes and ran over to Evolution Fitness in downtown San Jose.  I bought a day pass and hopped on an erg.  I had to be done, back to the hotel, showered, and in a cab in time for a 6pm business dinner.

Originally, I thought I had time to do a 2×30′ session, but as I was grinding away in the first 30 minutes, I was working out the timing and logistics of getting to my dinner on time and it was clear that I didn’t have that much time.  When I came into the gym, I notice a row of 4 nice new skiergs along a wall.  I decided that a I just finish up the first 30 minutes on the erg, and then give the skierg a try.

So 30 minutes at marathon pace, and then an exploratory session on the skierg.  The workout did not go very well.  It was hard work to sustain even the low end of the marathon pace band and my heart rate was way high.  It might have had something to do with not enough sleep, too much alcohol and way too much stress.  In any event, I was just glad to have had the chance to do a little training.

The skierg was quite an experience.  I just walked up to it, set the damper at 4, the PM to a 10 minute session and started pulling.  I started off at something like 38 SPM, and after a minute found that it was not even remotely sustainable.  I back off to 30 or so, and still redlined about 8 minutes into it.  My pace was incredibly slow, so I have to assume that my technique was crappy.  But it was an impressive workout.  It is full body like a rowing machine, but almost entirely the opposing muscles.  My shoulders, back and neck are all stiff today.

1-24a

Workout Summary - media/20170125-0115190o.csv
--|Total|-Total-|--Avg--|-Avg-|Avg-|-Avg-|-Max-|-Avg
--|Dist-|-Time--|-Pace--|-Pwr-|SPM-|-HR--|-HR--|-DPS
--|07207|30:05.0|02:05.2|178.5|19.2|152.9|160.0|12.5
W-|07210|30:05.0|02:05.2|178.4|19.2|153.0|160.0|12.5
R-|00000|00:00.0|00:00.0|000.0|00.0|000.0|160.0|00.0
Workout Details
#-|SDist|-Split-|-SPace-|-Pwr-|SPM-|AvgHR|MaxHR|DPS-
00|01221|05:00.0|02:02.9|186.7|19.1|139.4|150.0|12.8
01|01210|05:00.0|02:03.9|183.9|19.6|152.5|155.0|12.4
02|01210|05:00.0|02:04.0|183.5|18.9|155.8|157.0|12.8
03|01198|05:00.0|02:05.2|178.4|18.9|157.1|160.0|12.7
04|01179|05:00.0|02:07.2|170.0|19.7|156.7|158.0|12.0
05|01191|05:05.3|02:08.1|168.2|19.1|156.2|159.0|12.3

1-24d

Workout Summary - media/Import_28626041.csv
--|Total|-Total-|--Avg--|-Avg-|Avg-|-Avg-|-Max-|-Avg
--|Dist-|-Time--|-Pace--|-Pwr-|SPM-|-HR--|-HR--|-DPS
--|02351|10:00.0|02:07.6|168.4|30.9|169.2|183.0|07.6
W-|02356|10:00.0|02:07.3|167.8|30.8|169.8|183.0|07.7
R-|00000|00:00.0|00:00.0|000.0|00.0|000.0|183.0|00.0
Workout Details
#-|SDist|-Split-|-SPace-|-Pwr-|SPM-|AvgHR|MaxHR|DPS-
00|00253|01:00.0|01:58.5|187.7|35.2|143.0|159.0|07.2
01|00242|01:00.0|02:04.0|183.8|30.5|159.1|166.0|07.9
02|00237|01:00.0|02:06.5|173.2|31.1|166.6|169.0|07.6
03|00238|01:00.0|02:06.1|175.6|31.4|171.2|174.0|07.6
04|00232|01:00.0|02:09.3|161.5|30.8|172.7|175.0|07.5
05|00231|01:00.0|02:10.0|160.4|28.9|173.4|175.0|08.0
06|00231|01:00.0|02:10.0|159.2|28.2|175.9|178.0|08.2
07|00229|01:00.0|02:11.0|155.3|29.8|177.0|178.0|07.7
08|00228|01:00.0|02:11.4|153.9|29.3|178.0|180.0|07.8
09|00235|01:00.0|02:07.7|167.1|32.7|180.8|183.0|07.2

 

My knee surgery

On December 22, I had arthroscopic surgery on my right knee.  I was diagnosed with a tear in the medial meniscus cartilage.  Here’s a diagram of what that means.

torn_meniscus

The tear was diagnosed by an MRI.  Unlike the diagram, my tears appeared to on the inside edge of the cartilage, not the outside.  In addition to the meniscus tear, I was also diagnosed with osteoarthritis, which showed up as “fuzziness” in the surface cartilage in the tibia and femur in x-rays.

I was under general anesthesia for the operation which took less than an hour.  Three small incisions were made to introduce the camera, light source and surgical instruments.

Here are a couple picture of the inside of my knee showing the torn (frayed really) menicus cartilage.  The stuff that looks like fringe is the torn up inner edge of the cartilage.

There were also some pictures of the meniscus after the repair, but I didn’t manage to take photos of that.  The doctor also showed me pictures of the surface cartilage where it was degraded from the arthritis.  He said it was likely that this will potentially get worse over time, but could be treated with cortisone, simvisc and stuff like that.

I asked him if I should avoid impact sports like running.  He said that the research was inconclusive and contradictory.  He advised me to go by how the joint felt.  If it started to hurt, then avoid running.  I asked if I was OK to start rowing again and he gave me the green light for that.

After the surgery, I recovered quickly.  I was on crutches for a day.  I kept it iced during the day over the first 2 days, and it was basically immobilized with an ace bandage for four days.  After 4 days, I took off the ace bandage and changed the little bandages on the incisions daily.  I was walking a little stiffly on day 4, but gradually increased the range of motion of the knee.  By day 6, the range of motion was just about normal.  The only time I felt a twinge was walking down stairs.  I found out later that this is likely to be related to the osteoarthritis, not the meniscus and I should just get used to it.

I didn’t have any trouble with pain.  The doctor prescribed over the counter anti-inflammatory (Ibuprofen) to minimize swelling and I took that constantly for the full 10 days until the follow up appointment.  I did not need to take any of the stronger painkillers that he gave me.

And now I’m back at it.  Yesterday’s CTC session was slower than I liked, but that’s due to a lack of fitness, not a knee problem.  This morning, after rowing hard at r28, I have no knee pain or swelling.  I’m ready to call the surgery a success.

 

January CTC : 4 x 4′ / 4′ rest

Well, if I wanted to test how far my sprint fitness has declined, this would be a good way to do it.  Also, it would be a good way to see how well my knee works for full pressure rowing.

I figured that it would be a stretch to do this session with an average pace of 1:45.  To try to make myself a little less obsessive about the pace, I did the challenge with the watts screen up.  1:45 is just about 300W, but somehow, I figured I would do a better job backing off if I wasn’t looking at the pace sliding away.

I set up the session as a simple time interval session.  I used the first 4 minutes as a warmup with 4 power 10s close to my target pace.  Then 3 minutes of paddling.  I let the flywheel stop completely before the first interval to stay legal.

The plan was to try to hold 10W per stroke, but I found that I was having trouble getting my rating up above 28, even with the power above 300W.  I just went with it, but it sure felt like hard work.  I finished the first interval 303 watts (1:44.6).  I felt pretty toasted, but I recovered pretty well in the rest period.

I figured I should probably back off the 300w target a bit, but I set out in the second interval at 300W, but I needed to back off a bit in the second half and I ended up at 297W (1:45.6).  This one really stung and I was desperately counting down the strokes to the end.

For the third interval, I targeted 280W and I hoped that would be enough slack.  This one started pretty well, but I sure felt it in the last minute.  I beat the 280w, but just barely with 283W (1:47.3).

The last interval was going to be very difficult.  I decided to back off some more to 260W and see how it went.  I really wanted to just make it through without putting the handle down.  I did, 262W (1:50.0).

I did a progressive cool down, and then paddled enough meters to tick over 10km.

The summary graph shows that I was pushing this one close to the edge.  My max recorded HR is 185 and I matched that the last interval.

1-8a

This workout shows how using power is a better way to manage intensity for hard workouts.  HR lags power in shorter intervals, so here, you can see that I was pushing anaerobic power levels for about 14 minutes, which was the whole workout execpt for when I faded in the middle of the last interval.  By HR, it only shows 6:38.

This workout provides a good example of how the stroke based statistics of rowsandall can have errors that have a pretty big impact on shorter intervals.  I parsed the workout data to select just the 4 work intervals, and the summary data from there was.

Workout Summary - media/20170108-2130110o.csv
--|Total|-Total-|--Avg--|-Avg-|Avg-|-Avg-|-Max-|-Avg
--|Dist-|-Time--|-Pace--|-Pwr-|SPM-|-HR--|-HR--|-DPS
--|08888|40:00.0|02:15.0|193.6|24.5|157.2|185.0|09.1
W-|04476|16:00.0|01:47.2|286.4|27.1|169.8|184.0|10.3
R-|05529|32:00.0|02:53.6|129.4|22.5|149.1|184.0|06.2
Workout Details
#-|SDist|-Split-|-SPace-|-Pwr-|SPM-|AvgHR|MaxHR|DPS-
00|00004|00:00.0|00:00.0|152.6|00.0|75.0|75.0|00.0
01|01146|04:00.0|01:44.8|302.8|27.3|165.1|176.0|10.5 - +2m
02|01130|04:00.0|01:46.2|297.0|27.2|169.7|181.0|10.4 - -6m
03|01113|04:00.0|01:47.8|283.3|27.5|171.9|184.0|10.1 - -5m
04|01084|04:00.0|01:50.7|262.5|26.4|172.4|184.0|10.3 - -6m

This is close enough for analysis purposes, and to provide a good definition of work and rest strokes, but for challenges, you definitely want to use the PM directly.

Tomorrow:  10 min warmup, 40 min steady state, 10 min cool down

 

Wednesday:2 x 30′ spin

I feel like I’m falling apart.  Maybe it’s psychosomatic.  My knee is clicking away, over the past few weeks I’ve been bothered by some kind of a pinched nerve in my neck that hurts when I try to twist my head around (like to back up a car), and when I sleep.  My most recent complaint is my lower back.  I must have tweaked it when I did my “bumps” workout.  It was a little sore yesterday morning and I ignored it and rowed anyway.  Big mistake.  The rest of the day, I had a constant lower back ache, and if I twisted or leaned wrong, I’d get a sharper jolt of pain.

Anyway, it hurt enough that I had trouble sleeping.  Rolling over was pretty painful.  And I have a lot on my mind. So, I felt pretty lousy at 5:15 this morning when I got up.

I decided that rowing was a bad idea.  So, it would be the tedium of the stationary bike this morning.

The plan:

  • 2 x 30′
  • a couple minutes of stretching between
  • easy pace: UT2 / UT1

The first 30 minutes, I just set the machine to manual and pedaled at level 14.  The second 30 minutes, I did “rolling hills”, which was less scenic than the name implied.

Mission accomplished.

Tomorrow:  Knee Surgery.  Guess we’ll call that a rest day.

2 x 5K with bumps

I am doing my best to try to keep exercising as parts of my life go a bit out of control.  I decided on a very simple idea of just doing 10k a day.  Depending on the day, it might be hard or easy, but 10K takes around 40 minutes and I can get in and out of the gym in just about an hour.

I’ve done hard 10Ks, push 10Ks, L4 10Ks.  Today, I thought I would do a bumps workout.  I remember in the good old days of the concept2 UK site, that all of the 10SMPS folks would do these 8Ks with bumps.  They looked like misery.  Basically you row at about your steady state pace, and then every so many meters, you increase the pace to something faster (like 2K pace) for 100m (or 200m, or 250m, or whatever), then return to the steady state pace afterwards.

I thought it would be an way to get some faster rowing into the 10K format.  SO here was my plan for today.

  • 10K
  • 20 x ( 400m @ 2:00, 100m @ 1:45)
  • Free rate
  • Strapped in
  • No HR cap

Since this was a first attempt, I had no idea if this would be too hard or too easy.  It turned out to be too hard.  It didn’t help that I over-achieved on the sprinty bits.

I made halfway through, and I knew that I was in trouble.  I had decided that I would slow down the steady state, or drop out some of the fast bits.  That’s when the PM5 decided that it had gone just about far enough on this set of batteries and threw a persistent error.

The good news is that Painsled behaved perfectly!  When I looked later, the whole thing was safely on my iphone and it even handled the ignominious finish without any troubles.

I went to my gym bag, found a couple batteries (always prepared!) and changed them out in the PM5.  Then, with trepidation, I set up another 5K for more bumps action.

I only made it a couple of bumps into this one when I found that I couldn’t hold the 2:00 pace anymore.  My HR was sky high and wasn’t dropping much at all between bumps.  I skipped one bump and then rowed the steady state slower, between 2:05 and 2:10 generally, but slower right after the bump.

First 5K

12-19a

Workout Summary - media/20161219-175842-sled_2016-12-19T11-48-29ZEST.strokes.csv
--|Total|-Total-|--Avg--|-Avg-|Avg-|-Avg-|-Max-|-Avg
--|Dist-|-Time--|-Pace--|-Pwr-|SPM-|-HR--|-HR--|-DPS
--|05134|19:48.0|01:55.8|234.6|22.3|163.5|178.0|11.6
W-|05134|19:49.0|01:55.9|230.2|22.0|163.3|178.0|11.9
R-|00000|00:00.0|00:00.0|000.0|00.0|000.0|178.0|00.0
Workout Details
#-|SDist|-Split-|-SPace-|-Pwr-|SPM-|AvgHR|MaxHR|DPS-
01|00400|01:32.6|01:55.8|208.5|19.9|124.4|137.0|13.0
02|00100|00:20.7|01:43.7|311.0|26.0|144.7|150.0|11.1
03|00400|01:34.7|01:58.4|211.9|20.3|149.8|152.0|12.5
04|00100|00:20.2|01:40.8|341.1|28.2|153.1|156.0|10.6
05|00400|01:34.8|01:58.5|214.6|20.4|157.6|159.0|12.4
06|00100|00:20.3|01:41.6|326.4|26.7|158.6|161.0|11.1
07|00400|01:34.7|01:58.4|214.0|20.2|162.5|163.0|12.5
08|00100|00:20.1|01:40.5|336.1|28.2|162.7|165.0|10.6
09|00400|01:34.5|01:58.1|217.8|20.7|166.2|167.0|12.3
10|00100|00:20.0|01:39.8|353.5|28.6|166.9|168.0|10.5
11|00400|01:34.8|01:58.5|215.3|20.3|168.9|170.0|12.5
12|00100|00:20.1|01:40.3|336.5|28.2|169.2|171.0|10.6
13|00400|01:35.4|01:59.3|213.6|19.7|170.8|172.0|12.8
14|00100|00:20.2|01:40.9|327.6|27.4|171.3|173.0|10.8
15|00400|01:34.9|01:58.6|213.0|20.5|173.2|175.0|12.3
16|00100|00:20.8|01:43.8|308.7|27.8|174.0|175.0|10.4
17|00400|01:34.9|01:58.6|213.2|22.4|174.6|176.0|11.3
18|00100|00:20.6|01:42.9|317.4|28.4|174.6|176.0|10.3
19|00400|01:35.1|01:58.9|208.8|22.2|175.3|177.0|11.4
20|00234|01:00.8|02:09.8|200.6|24.7|174.6|178.0|09.3

Second 5K

12-19d

Workout Summary - media/20161219-2055100o.csv
--|Total|-Total-|--Avg--|-Avg-|Avg-|-Avg-|-Max-|-Avg
--|Dist-|-Time--|-Pace--|-Pwr-|SPM-|-HR--|-HR--|-DPS
--|05000|19:52.0|01:59.3|214.2|22.7|170.1|180.0|11.1
W-|05000|19:53.0|01:59.4|209.3|22.4|170.0|180.0|11.3
R-|00000|00:00.0|00:00.0|000.0|00.0|000.0|180.0|00.0
Workout Details
#-|SDist|-Split-|-SPace-|-Pwr-|SPM-|AvgHR|MaxHR|DPS-
01|00400|01:34.6|01:58.2|204.1|20.6|139.6|155.0|12.3
02|00100|00:20.8|01:44.0|302.5|26.9|157.1|160.0|10.7
03|00400|01:35.7|01:59.6|208.0|21.3|164.4|166.0|11.8
04|00100|00:20.8|01:43.9|305.3|26.2|167.9|170.0|11.0
05|00400|01:35.5|01:59.4|209.0|21.0|170.9|172.0|11.9
06|00100|00:20.6|01:43.1|315.5|28.8|172.1|174.0|10.1
07|00400|01:36.5|02:00.7|207.2|22.4|174.7|175.0|11.1
08|00100|00:24.7|02:03.6|176.0|21.2|170.6|172.0|11.5
09|00400|01:38.6|02:03.3|186.7|20.2|170.5|172.0|12.1
10|00100|00:21.3|01:46.6|284.0|26.8|171.3|173.0|10.5
11|00400|01:39.4|02:04.2|182.8|20.2|172.9|174.0|12.0
12|00100|00:21.2|01:46.2|291.3|26.7|174.4|175.0|10.6
13|00400|01:39.9|02:04.8|180.3|20.0|174.6|176.0|12.0
14|00100|00:20.5|01:42.6|310.0|28.0|176.3|178.0|10.4
15|00400|01:43.9|02:09.9|164.3|21.7|174.7|179.0|10.6
16|00100|00:20.3|01:41.7|314.2|28.3|174.0|176.0|10.4
17|00400|01:41.1|02:06.3|177.9|22.8|175.1|177.0|10.4
18|00100|00:20.3|01:41.3|322.0|28.7|175.3|177.0|10.3
19|00400|01:38.3|02:02.9|192.6|23.1|176.9|178.0|10.6
20|00100|00:19.6|01:38.2|362.8|31.0|178.3|180.0|09.9

So, next time I do this workout, I think keeping the slow bits at 2:05 might be a better idea.

My Dad

I got home on Thursday afternoon.  My wife called while I was waiting in customs.  I called her back as soon as I emerged and she told me that my father was in the hospital and that I should probably head up to see him.

A little back story.  My father was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in June.  They determined it was inoperable and he has been on a palliative chemo treatment regime since then.  He had a few good months, but has been getting weaker since the beginning of November.  We all went out for dinner together the Saturday after Thanksgiving and was in good spirits through the whole meal.

He took a turn for the worse on Wednesday.  His wife had trouble waking him up and he was unable to walk unaided.  He was also confused about his surroundings.  She called the doctor, who told her to call an ambulance, and they took him in to the hospital.

I got up there Thursday and he was in rough shape. He was lucid at times, but he seemed unaware of the world on his right hand side.  Other times, he would lose track of what was going on and start talking about a project at work that he was leading more than 30 years ago.  The difference from Thanksgiving to now was striking.  But for short periods of time we were able to converse quite normally.    He dropped off to sleep after I was there for about an hour and I went home.  The performed an MRI on him later that night and found that the cancer had spread to his brain.

After a pretty lousy day at work on Friday, I headed up to see my Dad in the hospital.  He was lightly sedated, and asleep while I was there.  He is developing pneumonia which is likely to be what actually kills him.  He would come close to waking up, try to clear his lungs and then drop back to sleep.  During the day, they decided to move him to hospice, and around 7:30, a couple of EMTs showed up and got him all bundled up for the move.  After I saw him off, I came home.

Now I am trapped in the house by snow.  I’m hoping it clears soon so I can head up to see him.  I don’t really know what I am hoping to see when I get there.  All I know is I really want to be there.

Monday: Quick 10K in Munich

I arrived at 5:00AM on the red eye from Boston to Heathrow, and connected to Munich, finally getting there at about 10am.  I had found my train and gotten to my hotel by 11:15.  There was nothing on my calendar until 1:00, so I decided to bolt over to the “Fitness First” next door to the hotel and band out a quick 10K.  I had no real plan, and pretty low expectations since I was working on basically no sleep.

The club has two meticulously maintained model Es with Pm4s.

As you can see from the HR charts, I started a bit slow, then tried to hold at a HR cap around 160.  Then with 2K left to go, I tried to speed up and hold about 210W the rest of the way.  This was hard work.

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I’m glad I did it, but it was pretty ugly at the end.